Alphabet Soup
by Pen Alchemist
Summary: Dang it Mustang, if you're gonna chicken out now why'd we even start? he slurred, his breaths coming in puffs. That was all the Colonel needed. [Yaoi, Lemon, Mpreg] A mistake that leads to so much more. Can you handle it? [ROYxEDxWINxAL]


**WARNING: yaoi, lemon and mpreg ahead. If you are not comfortable with any of these DO NOT READ! Thank you...**

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It had started with alcohol. How else would such a chaste alchemist succumb to the Mustang charm? Both were virgins in this way, though Edward Elric was married and Roy Mustang had had his share of women. The excitement over took the wills of iron as lips touched skin.

They had quickly retreated to Roy's apartment, only never making it to the bed. Instead it was a beautiful rug of plush white carpet with a beautiful exotic design.

Edward, spurred on by the blur of alcohol and sexual tension, had been the first to rip clothing only to toss it aside without a second thought. Roy smiled at the young man's eagerness, wondering if he should be the one to stop it, since the amount of alcohol was not enough to leave him completely senseless. It was then he was pushed down forcefully onto the plush carpet with the Fullmetal Alchemist on top, Ed's face was flushed and clumsey fingers struggling over the military belt buckel.

"Fine, but you're gonna get one hell of a wake up call," Roy smirked almost bastardly, but the buzz in Ed's head garbled his words when they reached his ears.

The experienced man helped with the belt, letting Fullmetal remove the rest, also beginning to loose himself completely in the sensual experience of feeling both flesh and metal caress him. Edward was on his own, exploring where he probably never thought possible. Touched with flesh, metal and tongue, Roy Mustang was the first to let out a groan of supressed sexual want, only spurring the young alchemist on.

Both bodies radiated heat as Mustang began to grow full and hard and Elric began to feel the fatigue of his actions. Roy saw the golden eyes become foggy and unfocused. Smirking, he decided to take over for the remaining time, though he himself was breathing hard and felt it hard to stay above the young man who was half exhausted and half drunk.

Roy was ready, tense and aroused he moved himself into position, taking great pains not to overtake the person below him. Asking if he was sure, the Colonel worried how this would effect the younger man. Edward, however just smirked, exhausted from the surprisingly long build up in their sexual exertion.

"Damn it Mustang, if you're gonna chicken out now why'd we even start?" he slurred, his breaths coming in puffs. That was all the Colonel needed.

Thrusting his hips forward, Ed yelled out a slurred string of profanity and Roy froze, only slightly aware of the flow of blood between their legs. Ed tried to shake sweaty blonde bangs out of his face. "What're yo'oin'? Gogo!" he said on the borderline of unconciousness.

Ed didn't even finish his slurred slander before Roy started up again, grinding his hips into the slender ones of Fullmetal. The blonde yelled out more profanities and arching his back in ecstacy.

Finally, in one brilliant orgasm, Ed collapsed into the sex-stained carpet, and Roy followed, crushing the younger alchemist below him. The stench of blood unaffected the unconcious men.

_**x**_

Sunlight crept into the Fullmetal Alchemist's closed eyelids, and forcing them to stay shut, Ed tried to explain to himself the horrible ache and pain all over his body. But his mind was a dangerous blur as his head pulsed with enough force as if a ledgion of canons were doing battle inside it, and the sunlight only sent shards of unwelcome needles of pain into the fray.

Everything in his mind told him not to open his eyes, but after a while he quickly got bored and did so, only to unleash a scream of horror at the sight that it brought him. Quickly forcing himself out from under Colonel Mustang, Edward Elric could only gape in silent horror at the still unconcious man laying in a puddle of blood--among other things--and gold eyes slowly follow the trail of still fresh blood to himself. (Specifically his groin.)

Naked and on a probably very expensive rug, Edward Elric couldn't remember what had happened but didn't even try as the full force of pain inside--if that's even possible--of his groin hit him. Loosing a wail of anguish of anger but most of all confusion and pain, he tried in vain to sheild it, bending over so far that his forehead touched the plush carpet (but moving too fast, so that another wave of painful shards came rushing into his head). Silently rocking back and forth, the young man didn't even realize that he was crying.

After enough time had passed--along with Edward's stomach contents as he vomited to the side--he was able to find enough strength to rise and collect his clothing which had been strewn across the floor. Unable to stop the rain of tears, Ed moved silently, trying and succeeding in not to wake Mustang, he slipped out the front door without another word.

The sun had barely risen into the sky, but the young alchemist just sat on the steps outside of the apartment building, his groin still terribly sore and making it difficult to walk. Breathing in deeply, Ed buried his face in his gloved hands, thinking of possible ways to get away from there--any way.

He had come to Central on orders from the Military to cover for a large amount of soldiers on leave and was not due back in Risenbool for another two weeks, where his brother Al and wife Winry waited for him. Suddenly, it felt like Alex Armstrong hit him in the stomach as Ed paled and wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow him whole.

Winry! How could he have done this to her? With his tears back and the water tap turned all the way on, Edward Elric sat on the steps as the sun made its brilliant climb into the sky, bringing the town to life. It was when the third jogger passed the stoop when Ed knew he had to move or risk running into Mustang.

Walking briskly--which was something, since the soreness around his groin and other places had seemingly gotten worse--Ed arrived at the train station around seven fifteen and promptly called his house. (He knew Winry would be up repairing automail limbs and such.)

"Hello, Rockbell Repairs for automail," came the cheery greeting and Ed mentally slapped himself on the forehead. That's right, she's a morning person.

"Um...hey," he said, once again mentally kicking himself for not coming up with a script, "it's me."

"Ed!" Winry's voice suddenly became more perky, which hadn't seemed possible before. "How's Central? Why are you up so early? Are you homesick? Do you miss me?" The last two questions were put in a lovingly mushy voice that made Edward temporarily forget his guilt and smile, only to have him come crashing back down to earth. And unintentionally he groaned, which was easily picked up by the sharp ears of a worried wife.

"What is it? Are you hurt? What happened?" and at once her mood went from peppy to concerned in one second flat.

"N-nothing, nothing," said the young alchemist, trying to put on a brave, even cocky voice to prove it. "It's just that I'm going to be coming home sooner than I thought."

"That's something to groan about?"

Ed chuckled. "No, no. That was just because I'm catching the early train out."

"You're coming back today!" Winry's shock seemed to be transferred right over the phone to Ed, who was just as shocked at his announcement.

"App-apprently," he said, his voice making a nervous leap.

"Okay, well, I'll see you soon," she said, confusion slowly turning into excitement while Ed remained stupified.

"Yeah... Soon..." was his weak goodbye as the dial tone already rang in his pulsing head. Hanging up the phone, he gave one heavy sigh before going to purchase his ticket. It was going to be a long ride back.

**_x_**

The train ride had been worse than he had expected. Surprisingly, Ed seemed to have adopted motion sickness as well as several other strange but plaguing pains. In between his mad dashes to a bathroom--or if he couldn't make that, an open window--his head gave the impression it was about to explode and his groin seemed to have caught fire. At some points, he bit down on his metal hand to keep from screaming in agony.

When he wobbled off the train into the arms of a brother (now in the flesh) and a loving wife, he was uncharacteristically pale and exhausted and wanted nothing more but to rest in a comfortable bed. (Confusing both Winry _and_ Al as they had both assumed he'd be wanting food as the first thing.)

Needless to say his sleep was plagued with horrifying pictures and thoughts that ended with him waking up yelling out into the night, shortly added with Winry's sleepy question of what was wrong. "Nothing," he grunted before swinging his legs out of bed and stalking out of the room--which was a very bad move since as soon as he closed the door softly behind him, Ed crumpled into the crippling pain--leaving Winry sleepy and confused in bed.

His head still heated and hurting, Ed thought that the cool summer air would help clear his heavy thoughts.

The wind did feel nice against his hot head, but it barely helped the ideas that were zooming in and out of focus.

Ed couldn't help but feel angry and helpless at what had happened. He had been drunk and Mustang had taken advantage of it, but why had he not staid and fight? This question was answered as another chorus of pains and sores became active again as he shivered from the strangely cool summer air. Sore and in pain, he had been frightened, which made the Fullmetal Alchemist even more upset.

And hungry, he realized as his stomach growled with a roar of a beast. Then again, Edward thought, it wasn't a surprise since he hadn't swallowed anything in over a day.

Seeking out the fridge (which was not a hard task) Ed let hunger take over, stuffing a multitude of things into his mouth and swallowing most of it whole. He was half way done, when a new but now ritual feeling of vomit rose up from his bowels which he quickly emptied into the nearest toilet.

Unable to get up, Ed only staid semi-vertical by supporting himself with the porcelean seat, his bangs covered his confused and pain-ridden eyes as well as blocking his sight of the door until--

"Ed?"

It was Al. The one person, Edward had avoided the most since he had arrived. How could he let his brother see him like this? But with the lack of better strength, Ed was crippled to his sitting position at the head of the toilet, forcing his eyes to look anywhere other than his brother, whose questioning look seemed to penetrate even the physical pain and adding to the mental.

"What happened big brother?" Ed only bit his lip, and for a moment staid silent. But then, for the first time he told the truth.

"I don't know."

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**Ta Da!** Well, so ends the first chapter at my first attempt at yaoi and mpreg. (And unlike some people, I actually mean it.) I hope I did well... And to tell you the truth before you ask, I'm really NOT sure how this connects with the title. Hehe... he...


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